6 Thoughts on Coping with Divorce and Children with Special Needs

In the United States, a divorce is a legal procedure by which a judge or other authority ends a married couple’s legal union. After a divorce, both parties revert back to their single status and are legally able to remarry. The federal government does not have authority over domestic matters like marriage and divorce in the United States.

Issues of spousal support, child custody, child support, property distribution, and debt division may arise during a divorce, but they are typically incidental or consequential to the actual dissolution of the marriage.

Divorce and its process is a complex procedure along with accompanying mental stress and anxiety, Nonetheless, it sometimes serves as the only option for safeguarding your interests (assuming you hire a competent attorney, of course). If your spouse has a history of substance addiction, child abuse, sexual abuse, or domestic violence, or if you suspect any of these behaviors in your partner, you should always consult a divorce lawyer for your possible best option.

In the United States today, the average marriage lasts 11.1 years, and 90% of divorces are resolved amicably, without resorting to the legal system. Divorce rates are currently higher for lower-income couples than for higher-income ones. The divorce rate for couples who were married in the early 2000s is 11% for those with college degrees and 17% for those without.

Coping with Divorce in the Presence of a Child with Special Needs

Divorcing and having a child with special needs is one of the hardest things you can go through. As a divorced, single parent of a beautiful daughter with special needs, I can tell you that you realize right away that as a custodial parent, you have to plan for the future, make sure your child is safe, and take care of her well-being. Your self-reliance and ability to parent alone will be put to the test by the things you do every day.

When a child with special needs is involved in a divorce, it is much harder to figure out who gets to keep the child, who gets to see the child, who pays for what, and how the property will be distributed. As part of your divorce lawsuit, you should think about all of your child’s special needs and have your lawyer walk you through a “day in the life” of caring for your child.

The extra costs for a child with special needs are not taken into account in child support charts. There is a growing need for specialized medical care, services, and equipment, as well as treatments, vitamins, and food that don’t need a prescription and paid care for the parent who has the custody of children while they are away. Estimating disability-related costs in a divorce agreement is hard because it’s hard to know what kind of care will be needed and how much it will cost.

1. Don’t Blame Yourself and Focus on Your Kid with Special Need 

The process of divorce during and after divorce is really hard and full of mental tension and anxiety, especially in the presence of a child with special needs. In such a situation, positive thinking is essential, particularly when one is attempting to figure out how to proceed after going through a divorce. Remember that it takes two people to start a relationship, and it takes two people to end one. If the dissolution of your marriage is causing you to feel guilty or ashamed, remind yourself that it also takes two people to end a relationship. 

2. Find a Support System and Spend Time with Your Kid with Special Need

The mental and spiritual toll of going through a divorce is something that is obvious to everyone who has been there and done that. Rely on your friends and family, both new and old, for support and assistance as you go through the most difficult periods in your life. Besides, you have to give time and support to your kid with special needs, take care of his medication and health-related matters, and education.

The process of coping with the effects of a divorce begins with the search for a support system. Making an effort to spend time with other people could initially feel difficult, but in the long run, it will be beneficial for you to do so. Make plans with your long-lost friends and get in touch with them. You might also try to connect with new people and spend time with them. Meeting up with other people who are going through something similar to what you are may be quite helpful, and support groups are an excellent location to do so.

3. Focus on Financing Your Needs Through Job or Business 

Self-care is essential at any time, but it becomes much more so when you’re going through a difficult life transition like a divorce. Investing time in activities that bring you joy, even if those activities consist of doing nothing at all, can make all the difference in the world. The better remedy to cope with such a difficult time is to manage and improve your financial matters, as you have the responsibility of a child with special care as well.

4. Find a New Hobbies, and Matters of Interest 

Keeping yourself occupied can be beneficial if you’re looking for new ideas about how to deal with the breakup of your marriage. It’s possible that the longer you go without doing anything productive, the more depressed you’ll become.

Right now is the ideal time for you to broaden your horizons and learn about new topics that can keep you occupied while also piquing your curiosity. Hobbies are a wonderful way to pass the time and keep yourself occupied. They have the ability to prevent you from concentrating on all of the changes that have occurred in your new reality.

5. Try to Forget About Your Past, Simplify Your Litigation Process and Feel Relaxed with Your Kid 

Dealing with the legal aspects of a divorce is an unavoidable reality for everyone going through a divorce. Yet, you should do everything in your power to steer clear of a drawn-out and protracted court battle. If it is at all possible, you should try to go through the divorce processes utilizing mediation because it can save you time, and money, as well as a significant amount of worry and anguish.

It is the time to forget about the nightmare of your past and move on with your kids with special needs. If still, some legal matters need attention, leave it to your divorce family lawyer to handle.

6. Go For a Therapy If You are Still in the Pain of Divorce 

If you feel as though you are struggling to cope with the emotional fallout of your divorce, it may be time to consider seeking professional counseling. It’s an alternative that is not only handy, but also cost-effective, and it works when and how you require it to work. You are able to participate in treatment sessions without the added inconvenience of having to travel to a clinic or wait for an appointment when you do so from the comfort of your own home.

Working through your divorce in therapy can provide you with a number of significant advantages as well as rewards. The effort you put in now could pay off in the future and result in you enjoying your best possible life. And that is the most valuable present you could ever bestow upon yourself.


When putting together a divorce agreement, special care needs to be taken with parenting plans, estate planning, and how the child with special needs shall be taken care of.  As more and more family lawyers deal with cases involving children with special needs, laws, and court cases are changing in each state. With the above-discussed tips and tricks, one can successfully overcome the nightmare of divorce and can move to a normal life.



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